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BOOK REVIEW
SURPRISE CHILD
FINDING HOPE IN UNEXPECTED PREGNANCY
By Leslie Leyland Fields
162 pages, WaterBrook Press
Colorado Springs, Colorado
www.surprisechild.com
Leslie Leyland Fields is a writer, teacher,
wife, and mother of six children living in Alaska where her
family runs a salmon fishing operation. She has experienced
two unplanned pregnancies and has talked to countless women
about this not unusual life changing event. She has written
a unique book providing in detail, the initial reactions of
several women in very different circumstances, to a surprise
child. The unexpected advent implied failure, mistake and
accident. The realities reveal unexpected joys, strength and
victories. It is a sad commentary on our times that a new
life so often elicits feelings of loneliness, desperation
and ambiguity in mothers and fathers.
According to the U.S. National Institute of
Health, 60% of all pregnancies in the U.S. are unplanned,
and this translates into three million women, half of whom
choose abortion.
According to the book, mothers in various
stages of life, from teen to grandmother, express their doubts
about their ability to cope. Some are rejected by the father
of the child and yet persevere, while others get full support
from father and family. Careers are interrupted, plans changed
and entire lives are re-routed. Not all mothers were able
to keep their child due to difficult life circumstances. Yet
the unfolding of these pregnancies chronicles a surprise of
strength, hope and joy. "Someone utterly new, never before
known" exists.
Many women immediately respond with joy on
learning of a pregnancy, but for the many who face the news
with anguish and doubt, this book is helpful. In fact, it
is helpful to all mothers because we forget the immensity
of motherhood. And older mothers can learn to appreciate the
added pressures on young mothers today, who have an array
of technologies which can complicate decisions and intrude
on the natural impulse to accept life's surprises.
In these times, when motherhood is not central
and cherished in society, this small book could be a lifeline
if put in the right hands at the right time. With abortion
so available, "free of charge", pressures are added
to which some succumb but which many resist heroically.
Many stories recounted in this book are of
loss, separation and reunion. Stories of apparent hopelessness,
with time, turn into happy endings - "how much light
he's brought into our house!" Some mothers, involved
in drug abuse and partying, changed their lives entirely to
accommodate the baby and now say "this baby saved my
life."
Many mothers are familiar with foolish and
hurtful comments made about their large families and in response
to the news that they are "expecting again!" The
book contains resources for support and discussion groups,
contacts to help new mothers and teens, and information about
health and adoption. These are American sources but some can
be used by everyone. One discussion group asks, "Our
culture defines success mostly in terms of money, power and
independence. What other measures of success do you think
are more important?"
Every chapter of the book begins with a statement
on the developing child and the physiology of pregnancy, as
well as a scriptural quotation to elevate the mind and remind
us of "something of greater value", eternal value.
So many mothers found that they were wrong
about their fears:
- We didn't expect to love this unexpected
baby as we do. We didn't expect her or him to love us as each
does… we forgot about love.
- He was a surprise only to me. Nothing about him was
a surprise to God.
- Who are we to decide who lives or dies?
- All our mothers made room for us. We will do the
same.
- All of us could have ended these lives in a few moments,
secretly, with only a doctor knowing. We could have gone on
with our lives just as planned, trying to maintain control
over our bodies and our future. But who can count or measure
what we would have lost?
- In carrying this child you are giving her or him
a chance to be. Without being what else matters?
This is a book truly worth writing, and reading.
For more information about the book and the author, see www.surprisechild.com
and links.
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